This morning I allowed a total stranger to smash my boobs in a specially-crafted boob-smashing device.

And tomorrow I’m taking Mike to the Open House at the public Kindergarten he’s been wait-listed for. (His name was 7th of 14 to be chosen for “overflow.” Fuckers.)

And I have no idea how to explain any of this to him. “Um, honey, we’re going to go visit a kindergarten. Not your kindergarten, per se, but a kind of sample kindergarten.”

Because there’s a good chance, but not 100%, that he will in fact get to go to this school I have to walk a very fine line about the details. I still haven’t figured out what I’m going to tell him, so I’ve told him nothing.

Oh, and don’t get me started about having moved to this city 10 years ago just so we would live somewhere that had good neighborhood schools. The houses aren’t cheap and the taxes are substantial. The district has known that enrollment was sharply increasing for years and refuses to open a new school…

So I’m just saying that this week had better start looking up soon.


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13 responses to “This morning I allowed a total stranger to smash my boobs in a specially-crafted boob-smashing device.”

  1. Megan (Velveteen Mind) Avatar

    We just got the call today that a slot has opened up for the fall for my 2 yr 9 mo old. We’ve been on the waiting list for a year. I don’t even want my child to attend pre-k until he’s 4, but we need to enter him part-time at 3 so that he can make it to the top of the list for pre-k priority.

    This. is. ridiculous.

    I’m a stay-at-home mom. I don’t need child care. I just want him to have choices for kindergarten. Even typing that is ridiculous.

    I want so badly to just refuse to be this competitive. To just say “screw all ya’ll!” because my baby is still a baby! When the teacher said, “school starts on August 1st,” I just wanted to die. I know I am not talking about school schedules when my son is not even three. I know this is not happening.

  2. crunchycarpets Avatar

    Yeah..we signed up Adam for Kindergarten and now we have a Orientation Session where they will tell us what he is supposed to know BEFORE he starts school!

  3. creative-type dad Avatar

    I am not looking forward to those years…

  4. Shauna Avatar

    Yes, how do you explain that? When we took nicholas on preschool visits, he liked the one with the biggest sandbox and when we chose a different one, he couldn’t understand why he didn’t go there… Wish I had advice for you…

  5. pelf Avatar

    Ouh.. So that one-sentence-title sums up about Mammography? No further stories? :)

  6. karrie Avatar

    Ouch.

    And….ouch.

    I’m pretty much resigned to paying some kind of tuition extortion for M. The whole K thing is extremely confusing here as well.

  7. Sara Avatar

    Boob-squashing..sounds almost like an Olympic event doesn’t it?

  8. Kelly Avatar

    So, ummmm, this may be an odd question, but how do you wait-list at a public school? Or is it not a public school? And if it is…where is he supposed to go? I’m so confused.

    Love your title by the way.

  9. Plain Jane Mom Avatar

    Kelly: Not an odd question, just an odd answer. It is a public school, so he’s guaranteed a spot somewhere in our school district not necessarily our neighborhood school. But with the state law that caps class size at 20 the school’s hands are tied.

    That said, they should have opened a new school years ago. Instead they’ve been adding ‘modular’ (Read: trailers) classrooms to existing schools and now they don’t have room for more of those either.

  10. Nell Avatar

    Argh. We’re going through the same thing with Matilda. We won’t know until JULY if she will be in the kindergarten we want, or the “other” kindergarten. We have visited both, just to be prepared. Waiting sucks.

  11. Suzanne Avatar

    This public school wait list thing is crazy. We have it here in NYC too. And don’t even get me started about the child care/pre-k situation. It’s madness.

    Hope your tits are OK.

  12. Jessica Avatar

    Personally, I’d take a mammogram over a pap smear any day.

  13. […] The eye machines were significantly better, however, than the device used on me on Tuesday. But then they dilated my eyes. Again. I hate that SO MUCH. You walk out into the parking lot like a drunk seeing the sun for the first time in weeks. Awful! […]

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